CFD Reunion Show

Here.

The fact I will be in school by then and must skip class on Friday has no bearing whatsoever on my attending. This is a once-in-a-lifetime event. I don't even care what the set list will be. Anything.

I could almost cry I'm so happy.

i sing of Olaf glad and big

I finally found my favorite e.e. cummings poem. Here it is:

i sing of Olaf glad and big
whose warmest heart recoiled at war:
a conscientious object-or

his wellbelov'd colonel(trig
westpointer most succinctly bred)
took erring Olaf soon in hand;
but--though an host of overjoyed
noncoms(first knocking on the head
him)do through icy waters roll
that helplessness which others stroke
with brushes recently employed
anent this muddy toiletbowl,
while kindred intellects evoke
allegiance per blunt instruments--
Olaf(being to all intents
a corpse and wanting any rag
upon what God unto him gave)
responds,without getting annoyed
"I will not kiss your fucking flag"

straightway the silver bird looked grave
(departing hurriedly to shave)

but--though all kinds of officers
(a yearning nation's blueeyed pride)
their passive prey did kick and curse
until for wear their clarion    
voices and boots were much the worse,
and egged the firstclassprivates on
his rectum wickedly to tease
by means of skilfully applied
bayonets roasted hot with heat--
Olaf(upon what were once knees)
does almost ceaselessly repeat
"there is some shit I will not eat"

our president,being of which
assertions duly notified        
threw the yellowsonofabitch
into a dungeon,where he died

Christ(of His mercy infinite)
i pray to see;and Olaf,too

preponderatingly because
unless statistics lie he was
more brave than me:more blond than you.

Source.

Painting-Performing

I think we should all become painter-performers like so:
















So the idea came about when me and my co-workers noticed the guy painting across the street had a motorbike in the trailer hooked up to his bike. I thought it would be absolutely awesome for him to do something akin to the picture above (he could even use just one sprayer if he's a wimp!). My associates thought it was retarded. But enough about their thoughts. They can cry while I'm rolling in the dough.

My idea is that people want to be entertained and also want their house painted. So why not combine the two? The painter would race around the house with the spray machine mounted on the back of the bike and the sprayer in his hand facing the house. He would spray a narrow ribbon, flying off jumps that his co-workers built for him, and then, after a lap, he would raise or lower where he held the sprayer and go around the house again. In this way he could get most of the ground floor in a matter of minutes. Then someone else could get up on stilts or something and do the upper stories. In this way, I would save time with the bike (and also with the stilts by not needing to move ladders) and money with the stilts (no ladders needed!). And, best of all, the customer would be entertained.

Maybe we could have tigers there too. In cages, of course. Or fighting with the customer's dog(s).

Interested parties should contact the local branch office of Jimminican Painters LLC.

British Terror Plots

I just had to say something, since the media is making such a big fuss over them.

So let's be realistic here: these "car bombs" are downright comical. The first two were just jugs of gasoline with a cell phone stuck in with them. Nobody told the builders that they needed some plastic explosive or something to hook the cell phone up to so that it would blow the gas cans. I mean, even I know that. As for the flaming car of doom that rammed into Glasgow's airport: what. I mean, did they really expect setting themselves on fire and driving into a building would do anything? Maybe they were so desperate to do something right that they thought that was worth a try. Personally, if I was a counter-terrorism official, I hope everybody out there is like these guys. It would sure make my job easier.

And as for the oft-alleged al-Qaeda link, I think we need to be realistic here as well. Al-Qaeda is a group of professional killers, as they have demonstrated over the past ten years. I cannot imagine them having anything more to do with this group of fruitcakes then those ninja-terrorists they found in Orlando a few years ago.

I'm not saying the threat is gone, but that, once again, we've managed to overblow a minor event (like the liquids they confiscate off of planes now) and make it a huge deal. They interviewed a bunch of tourists in the US tonight on the news, and all the ones they talked to were oh-so-worried about terrorism and were glad to be surrounded by lots of heavily-armed cops. I mean, it could happen here, right? Those gas cans...